My irrelevant con parties opinion.
Let’s start by saying that I’m not the most prominent party girl. The first nerdy party I went to was simply because I was working at the event; I didn’t have much interest in going even though plenty of my mutuals went to them. While I didn’t have a terrible time, let’s just say it was a bit meh for me as time passed. The party didn’t offer the same sense of community and connection that the daytime con events did. Spending my night in a loud, crowded room filled with people I barely knew didn’t do shit for me. Long story short, I was somewhat bored after a while. That was nothing on the party; that’s a me thing because I just don’t find partying to be fun after a couple of hours.
It’s no secret that many people go to cons simply for the sake of partying. It’s gotten to a point where the community thinks that’s the main focus of the weekend and the principal factor of a convention, which confuses me because most of these parties are not even connected with the events themselves: they are outside events that use the con as a way to get people to spend their money and attend. A lot of people don’t even attend the con for the weekend; they’re just in the area for the parties. I know I can be a bit clueless at times, but there are so many other things to do the entire weekend besides that.
Personally, I think con parties outside of the event can be a bit exploitative of the attendees. What exactly do I mean by that? Cons are getting more and more expensive as the days go by, and the things that are a part of them have raised their prices just as well. For one, these parties take place in a location outside the convention; most of the time, you have to drive to these places because they are not within walking distance. So boom, you’re spending money on rideshare and gas. Next, you have to pay to get in. If you want to eat and drink, you have to pay for that too; they are not cheap with the alcoholic beverages. These parties are not contributing to the con’s programming, by the way, because most of them are unofficial! I went to the last con party I attended simply because it was a part of the event programming: all I had to do was walk into the room where it took place to get in. I didn’t have to leave the building, nor did I have to pay an extra fee.
I am over going to unofficial con events.
Because parties have become a significant thing within the cosplay and nerd community, it has overshadowed the main events. There is so much that goes into the official convention: the panels, workshops, artist alleys, and cosplay events that show the talents and passions of the people within this space. I feel as though people have lost focus on what conventions were created for in the first place: to meet people who have similar interests as you. From personal experience, these parties are not environments where you can really mingle with people about your interests. It’s dark inside, the music is loud as hell, and you can’t hear anyone speak. Party culture has contributed to more problems within this space. Not only does it make it difficult to interact with others, but usually, when the drama comes to light, the incidents occur in the party environments.
I often tell people to take what I say with a grain of salt and form their own opinions. Con parties can be fun, but they shouldn’t dominate the entire weekend. By no means do I think it’s wrong for people to attend parties during a con. But as someone who’s been to some parties, I have only enjoyed a few of them. Con parties are overrated.
Why may you ask? For one, these places all play the same damn songs, and I wish they’d switch up the playlist.
Another thing is that plenty of people lack manners, and it’s frustrating dealing with such rude people. Parties are usually where so much of the mess comes from during these weekends. I was so lost on numerous issues within the nerd community until I started going to parties and hanging out with people outside of the convention space. Let’s just say I am extremely limited in who I hang out with and what I attend. Parties are where so much of the bad happens as conventions (Anything terrible that happens in a nightclub happens at these parties, by the way, if you wanted a hint), and if you’re going to attend, please be cautious of your surroundings. Go with a friend; keep your drink in your hand. Respect the space you are in and the people around you.
The main reason I wrote this is because, at a certain point, I thought I had to go to all these parties to fit in with this community. I go to cons as an adult for the same reasons I went as a kid: to mingle with people who have similar interests as me. I no longer care about fitting in now; I care more about my sanity and safety than the acceptance of people who don’t care for me.
Thank you so much for reading. If you would like to read more, please consider purchasing The Con Journey.